Bronx Zoo Valentine's Day Roaches (are the way to your true love's heart)

Valentine's Day gift pack
Valentine's Day gift pack via Bronx Zoo

The twinkling lights of December have been tossed to the curb, the confetti of January has been swept under the radiator, and February will soon be here to turn a young lover's mind towards the memories of heartbreak that accompany Valentine's Day.

Soften the emotional burden a bit this year by participating in the Bronx Zoo's annual cockroach-naming celebration. With a donation of at least $15, the zoo will nickname one of their Madagascar hissing cockroaches in recognition of whomever you choose, whether they be entomologist loved ones or a former lovebug who broke your heart. Either way, the money raised will help all the animals at the Bronx Zoo, from aardvark to zebra.

Although the photo makes it look like they ship you a tiny roach coffin, donations at the $30 and $55 level actually come with the option to receive a small "Roach Candle" packaged in a tin the size of a roach coffin. The scent of the candle is mysteriously never mentioned, but hopefully cockroaches prefer vanilla or a mild sandalwood. Take your chances by sparking up a roach candle or opt for a pair of colorful roach socks as your included gift.

Submit your best roach nickname before February 4th to ensure you'll receive the authentic naming certificate by Valentine's Day.

Did you know? The zoo's roaches aren't the everyday subway-dwellers β€” they are Madagascar hissing cockroaches, a much larger variety that has even been kept as pets πŸ₯°πŸ›

i'm trying to make new memories
in cities where we fell in love

β€” Ani Difranco, "Bodily"

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